Be the change you want to see in the world: visiting The Haven

The day I went to The Haven, in an area outside Kalomo, called Namwianga, I met Kathy Merritt, who has been in Zambia and running the orphanages/school for 35 years. The Project has four orphanages, Kelly’s House, Eleanor’s House, Marjorie’s House and Eric’s House. Kelly’s House is for infants up to 2 yrs of age; Eleanor’s House is for 2-4 year olds. Marjorie’s House is for infants with HIV and TB; and Eric’s is for older children. The Haven orphanage was started because the administration at the school discovered that when a mother died, for what ever reason, the villagers would bury the small babies alive with their mothers. Without a mother to nurse the child to health and take care of it, the baby would die anyway. Thus the Haven was born out of a rescue effort. Once the child is old enough (around 4 yrs) the family is contacted in hopes of the child will be able to go back home. Some extended families and fathers visit, others never come back, thus the need for Eric’s House. Running these homes is an enormous prospect, costing approximately $20,000 US a month, $4,000 of that in formula alone!

Carole

Irene

Kathy didn’t have long to spend with me, she was preparing to take one of the toddlers to the hospital for x-rays, he had tried to jump from one crib to another (I later saw the x-ray; he had broken his leg). We started in Kelly’s House where I was introduced to Cecilia or “Big MaMa” who oversees The Haven and works in the Kelly house. Kelly House has a large meeting/dining area, which was being used at that time for intake purposes, and also had a small relaxing area for some of the care givers. It was there I met Carole, who at 6 weeks was barely 4 lbs; I doubt she has survived; she was so tiny and sick. Princess and Prince were a fairly robust set of twins, 3 months old; their mother had died during delivery (a VERY common occurrence I found, both the twins and the fact of the mothers dying during delivery). Irene was 2 months old at the time and could almost fit in the palm of my hand; another little one I doubt has been able to hang on. These babies were in this holding area, waiting for medical tests to be performed, before being put in with the others. Marjorie’s House is home to approx. 30 babies, ranging from 1- 18 months old. There are 3 rooms that the children sleep in and are divided by age. There is one volunteer mother for every 5 – 10 babies, depending on the day. There is no way you can hold any of these babies and not fall in love with them. You alternate holding and feeding different ones, trying to make certain each one is held and has some human interaction. Most lie in their beds looking around and not making a sound.

Then it was changing time…try that with 30 babies. I don’t know how, but these ladies know who’s been changed and who hasn’t, I forgot in about 5 minutes. And, think about the laundry!! All cloth diapers and washed by hand, now that is a labour of love!

Oh, that laundry

I was next taken to Eleanor’s House. This is the house that holds the older children, usually between the ages of 2 to 4. I arrived to see the children playing on the porch, with one caregiver; there was lots of pushing, shoving, hitting and smacking, the usual activity of children this age trying to score the few toys available. When I arrived they ALL wanted to be picked up and cuddled, and if you did so, others would come and want their turn and the one you are holding would kick and push him or her away. No one was ready to give up their personal cuddle time! When I came back to pass out the dolls it was right before lunch, which consisted of sheema and tomato sauce. Sheema is a staple here in Zambia, when cooked it is a lumpy doughy substance perfect for the toddlers. Feeding was interesting with each child having their own special bowl; the children sit on the floor or stand while you try to keep their attention to feed them. The dolls seemed to make a happy addition to their lunch some trying to share with their new found friend. After there was a short play time, where some had a fun time with the thank-you signs I made, shaking them about, as they made a great new sound. Then the ladies try to put the children down for naps - some of the older ones can climb out of their beds; as noted with the one who broke his leg. Have you ever tried to keep one of your children in bed at nap time? Take that times 39.

It was on to the little ones at Marjorie’s House next. This is the house where the children with HIV/AIDS, TB and other medical problems live. Kathy told me the sad fact that they had not had one child with AIDS who, even on ARV’s, had lived past the age of 5 - sad, but true. This little girl has Cerebral Palsy and has been at the orphanage since birth. You want to multiple yourself or scream to the world, please come and just hold them, do something! There are usually 25 - 30 babies and children in this house as well.

Most of these little ones were terrified of the dolls! Whether it was the painted faces, or quite what, I wasn’t sure, but I left enough for them and hoped they would eventually come to find comfort in the cuddles of their new friends.

Eric’s House was across the road and I wasn’t scheduled to go over there, so I didn’t expect to meet any of the children; but lo and behold, some came down a path, heading to the after school building behind Eleanor’s House. They hailed me (as I was quickly putting out the ciggy I was sneaking behind one of the nearby bushes, and went to go back inside, after spotting them and not wanting to have them see me smoking) and wanted to chat and hear about where I came from and what I was doing. I explained, as best I could where I was from, but they didn't know where Canada was, so I asked them about their hopes and dreams, what they wanted to be or do when they grew up. I then asked if they would like a doll - or - were they to old? Oh no, they said, they would very much like one and also ones for their brothers and sisters ( I took that to mean other children at Eric’s House), which ended up being a total of about 30 dolls, which they immediately stashed away into their backpacks, as if afraid they would be taken back, or disappear. Even with these older children, I’m sure the dollies will be much loved and a small comfort, after all, these older children need love too, they are the vunerable - orphans and street children.